Puberty, But Make It Public

From awkward first periods and learning how to use a pad, to sadangus and realizing your entire extended family somehow knew what was happening before you did... this episode is all about growing up.

We laugh our way through the chaos of figuring out periods, the advice we got (whether we asked for it or not), and the reality of navigating a topic that was somehow both completely private and everyone's business at the same time.

We also talk about balancing the cultural traditions we grew up with, the taboos surrounding menstruation, and how our perspectives have shifted toward body positivity, autonomy, and being able to talk about our bodies without embarrassment.

Whether you had a sadangu, learned everything from your friends, or are still wondering why no one ever explained what was going on, this episode is a reminder that none of us really had it figured out, and that's okay.

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Hi everyone, welcome back to Ukkka's Unsolicited Advice. I'm your host, Artie, and today we're talking about a core memory for so many of us growing up Thummel. Our first period. For some, it was confusing, for some, it was embarrassing, and for others, it was a mix of what is happening to me, and why is this somehow everyone else's business now? In Thummel culture, your period isn't just a private moment. It's an arrival sometimes leads to a very public event called a sedinge. In this episode, we're talking about what that experience was actually like for us, how our parents explained or didn't explain what was happening, how much we learned from our friends instead, and what it felt like to have something so personal turned into something so visible. So we're just gonna go forth and just get right into it. We have Darshni here today. Darsh, do you remember when you got your first period?

SPEAKER_02 1:03

Yeah, I remember my first period. It was, I think, the summer between seventh and eighth grade. So I do remember like I was older than my friends who had not older, but I got it later than my other friends, and so and I was really thrilled about it. I won't lie. I was like, okay, alright, I can keep putting this off. And then when it happened, I was I was not thrilled. I was a little bit relieved because like everyone kept talking about it, and it's like sudden good, when are we gonna do this? And people were always asking me, I was like, oh yeah, because I have so much control over this. Like, so I was a little bit relieved that the questions and all the crap would stop, but also frustrated because I didn't want all the things that came with all the cultural expectations that came with it. But I still remember my dad came home and he gave, he was like, Oh my god, congratulations! Until this day, I think about that moment and I die a little bit. I was like, I don't want your congratulations, but he was so he was like, I'm so happy for you. I was like, please stop talking to me.

SPEAKER_01 2:10

It's just what I remember the weird thing to be happy about.

SPEAKER_02 2:16

I know he was like, I think he was trying, like, he knew how I felt about it. He knew it was making me uncomfortable. So he thought if he was like happy and he was trying to show me that it was like it's normal and it's okay and it's this, and I'm like, it's not working. Stop.

SPEAKER_01 2:32

I'm like, there's no right reaction to this, but this feels like the wrong one.

SPEAKER_02 2:38

Yes, correct.

SPEAKER_01 2:39

It was it, but he was no, it was funny. So, like my first period, I remember it really well, so now everyone's gonna get like a real TMI version of this. I was peeing, and then I was like, oh fuck, there's blood. And then I told my mom, and she was like excited, like she was so thrilled. And I was like around the same age, I think I was like 13, and all my friends have also already gotten it before me, so like I kind of knew I knew it. I wasn't like, what is happening to me? I was more like, well, it happened, and my mom was like way too effervescent, and like if anyone's ever met my mom, they know that like effervescent is like not her like primary adjective, so it was weird, and then she like told my dad and was like, my dad, like was hugging my dad, and I was like, This feels like you've made this about you. Y'all didn't do anything so weird, and that was it, like that was their initial reaction, and then they were calling and like oh they're calling everyone, and they're like, And I'm like, why is this their business? Yeah, I'm like, I feel like we're we're real sharing this with everybody, okay. Meanwhile, do you know what I did? No one talked to me about it. I call my friends, like the first people I was like, I texted all my friends on my cute little flip phone, and I was like, guys, I got my period, and I was so excited. What a lie. What a lie. Did you learn about your period beforehand? Like, did you know what you were getting into before? Maybe not like actually, but like, did you have an idea?

SPEAKER_02 4:27

Yeah, I my parents were really good about it. My parents had like so many conversations about so many things growing up, and this was one of them. Like, I think it was their way of like trying to make conversation normal between us, and so they were like, you know, this this will happen, and this is what you do if it happens at school, this is what you do if it happens at home, and this is what we can do to support you, and blah blah blah. And I don't think I expected like I expected like the common things, right? But I didn't expect that I'd break out every single time, or I didn't expect that I would have these mood swings that came along with it, right? I just thought, okay, so like I get cramps and I bleed and then I'm in pain. Like I thought about all of that, but I didn't really, I didn't realize that I didn't I eat like an animal the week before, and then I'd eat nothing the week, like all of these additional things. I don't think I don't think I don't know how much anyone really could have prepared me for, you know. I thought that was and also like this is very TMI, but I didn't the amount of blood that comes is like I wasn't prepared for that. Like, there's just so many things that like you, I don't know if anyone can really prepare you for until you're dealing with it and you're in the moment. It was just all it was conceptual, right? It's all like conceptual and it happens, and you're like, oh my god, this happens every yeah.

SPEAKER_01 5:58

So we had sex ed in fourth grade. Like, I knew I was gonna get my period, and my parents were not my source material. I, if they ever had a conversation with me about my period, I don't remember it because I want to say they never did, but I feel like my mom's gonna listen to this and be like, remember that time? I don't remember. I don't remember a conversation about it. I remember asking them after I got my period to buy me tampons, and then my mom bought me super plus tampons. I was 13.

SPEAKER_02 6:33

That's amazing.

SPEAKER_01 6:34

She bought me But it's it's very on-brand for her logic. I appreciate her logic. She was like, Why would you get the small one when you could get the big one and that can absorb more blood? Like, she's not incorrect. How you fit a superplus up my hoo-ha when I'm a child is is the issue there. Uh yeah. Superpluses are not for first-time period people friends. Don't do that to people. I remember my friends then subsequently in high school. This is so overshare. I'm so sorry, everyone. Standing outside the bathroom. I remember this so well. They were in the bathroom, they were outside the bathroom stall, and they were trying to teach me how to put a tampon in from outside the bathroom stall, and it was hilarious and unsuccessful. Yes, yes, bonding, childhood bonding. So I think a lot of my stuff came from my friends rather than my parents. Because I think everything, especially about my reproductive health specifically, I feel like came from my search for knowledge and my friends rather than my parents who were not helpful, or even like doctors and stuff. Like, I remember the first time because my like period was irregular, we went to the doctor and she like put me on like the mini pill, which is like the progesterone only pill. This lady deadass told me that it wouldn't protect me from pregnancy. That's not true. What she like lied. This OBGYN lied to me to my face as a child who didn't know any better that it would only like make my period regular, it wouldn't prevent pregnancy. That is not true. So that's like the stuff, because she was obviously like a brown lady and my mom was sitting right there. Like I was a 14-year-old dweeb, like this wasn't a level of concern that you needed to have for me that you needed to lie about it. Come on, right? So yeah, so I would say my my external resources were a better source of information. Um was your period in your family viewed as something that's like normal, secretive, or like shameful? It is a complicated feeling because I feel like we have family members who like have to sleep outside and aren't allowed to go into the kitchen when they're on their period. Yeah. So like I think this is a really interesting question because obviously that was not my household.

SPEAKER_02 9:27

Yeah. Right. Yeah, no, that wasn't my household either. No, I I meant interesting.

SPEAKER_01 9:34

I mean, that that isn't it diabolical like in this time and age that occurs still.

SPEAKER_02 9:40

Yes, but yeah, 100%. I think for me it was interesting because like it was such an uproar, like like celebratory news, right? Like Amanappa calling everyone and saying, Oh, this happened, blah blah blah. And then it's celebrated in the Sadhango with such like wow. But then right after it's like it there's like, I mean, my parents were not like that, right? There was no shame, there was no taboo, there was nothing about my period. It wasn't even a thing that we even had to discuss. But then when you go to India, then it does become like a secret of like, oh, can you go to the temple? Oh, can you can you can you go into the Sami room? I find that really frustrating. It's like my everyday experiences were are fine, just fine. Like they're so normal that it's not even something that I think about or I've ever thought about. That's how privileged I think I am to have a family like that. But it it only becomes shameful and secretive in India around around specific kind of occasions. Otherwise, it's not even in India, otherwise, no one cares, right? If I'm on my period, I'm with my grandparents, like no one cares. My grandparents don't care. It's more of like when you know there's a thirbullah and then the Sami comes, or like you're going, oh it's up, like it's all God and religion related that the it becomes a shameful secretive thing. But if religion and all of that isn't there, no one cares. No one cares. I still remember once back when I was really young and I was having really irregular periods, and every time it would happen, it'd be I'd be in a lot of pain. Once I just like not passed out, but I just fell asleep. I was like in so much pain, I just fell asleep. I woke up to all four grandparents sitting in a line watching me sleep because they were so worried about me. And they were like, Aya was like, Are you okay? Do we need medicine? Do you need do you need Elani? I'm like, yeah, fine, thank you. This is also not a discussion that I want to have with my grandfather, but thank you. Thank you all. I was like, thank you, mom, for letting them all know what's going on with me. But that's that's just the family like that I grew up in, and I'm really grateful for it. But yeah, it's interesting because normal experience is different than an experience associated with religion.

SPEAKER_01 12:09

Which is so interesting because so traditionally, women are not supposed to go into the kitchen or go to the temple when they're on their period. And obviously, I have a lot of feelings about this, but my mom was sitting down and explaining this to me one day, and she's like, the idea is that it's supposed to be a purpose to give you a break. Like, you're not supposed to go into the kitchen because primarily in the past, women are the primary kitchen dwellers. They're the ones who make all the food for the family. So the idea was that when you're on your period, you should be not in the kitchen because you should be resting and taking care of yourself and not cooking for your entire family. The idea of not going to the temple was is once again rest. Like, you shouldn't need to walk all the way to the temple and pray today, even though you go every single day because you're on your period and you need a rest and you need a break. She's like, the patriarchy destroyed what was something intended to protect women into something that to ostracize women. And she was like, that's something that you need to think about. That like religion at its core is not the thing that's flawed. The patriarchy is.

SPEAKER_02 13:28

So 100%.

SPEAKER_01 13:31

Right.

SPEAKER_02 13:32

100%. My dad had the same exact conversation with me. 100%.

SPEAKER_01 13:36

But another thing is like, I guess periods were like a normal conversation, also because like I didn't allow for it to not be normal conversation. Like, one of my greatest fears would was that like my brother was gonna turn into like one of those men that like get like super icked out by periods. Like, you don't want to be that guy, and so I always talked about it because I wanted him to feel comfortable about it, and my brother isn't that guy, like he doesn't care. He's like, I think like men who have sisters are like such better human beings than men who don't, and I will stand by that statement. But I have really one really funny story. My dad, God bless him, I was like in my 20s when this occurred. He calls me up like very seriously one day and he goes, Othie, have you heard of toxic shock syndrome? Mind you, I'm in my 20s. I'm in my 20s, and my dad, I was like, Yes, I have, dad. Why do you ask? And he was like, I just read about it today, and I know you wear the tampons, like you could get this and like die, and I'm like, that is that is true. It was like so nice, but it was like so chaotic. This is like an insane time frame to tell me about this. Like, I'm in my 20s, it's been over a decade since you were supposed to counsel me about this, but okay. And he was like, You gotta be really careful, and I'm like, I I am, and he's like, Okay, okay. I just wanted to make sure you knew about it. And I'm like, okay, thank you for your concern. I was dying. I was like, I don't even know what to say. It was great. I'm like, I wonder what like work like didactics he was taking, like a lecture or something must have happened for this to have dawned on him. Yeah, but I like still like it was like the most like okay conversation. So, yes. So, fun fact about both me and Darshni is that we both had sadangas before we got married, like when like right around the time where we got our period. So, traditionally, or at least in our family, so if anyone's gonna come at me and say I'm wrong, I'm sorry. But sadangas are traditionally done as one of the days of your wedding. So in our in our like culture, um during those like wedding events, right before the wedding is usually when people have a sadanga, and it's when your uncle sort of gives you away in the family. We didn't have that, we had it like right around the time that we got our periods. Mine was because I was like the oldest granddaughter of a son to my grandmother, and they were concerned because she was older, that I she wouldn't be alive when I got married, so they wanted to do the sarango for her, which is a true statement because she is not alive and I am not married. So that's why what it's true.

SPEAKER_02 17:00

I just like how you said that.

SPEAKER_01 17:03

I mean, think about it. The sarango is great because Aputha got to see me all dressed up and nice back when I was a nice person. So it all worked out, but that's why we did it, because normally in my my immediate family, we don't like do we don't like celebrate anything excessively because we don't. So this is why we did my settinga. Why'd they do yours?

SPEAKER_02 17:26

I don't have a good answer for that. If I'm being really honest. I I guess I could also say that I was the first child of that house of born to a man in that house, because I have my my husband.

SPEAKER_01 17:42

Oh, I have three older female cousins.

SPEAKER_02 17:45

Yeah, exactly. Exactly, right? Like and they did they did send this for all of them, but they they live in Singapore, so they did they did theirs in Singapore, I think. Mine, I not only had had to have one here, like like one that I I I didn't leave the house until they did, by the way. So yeah, I had to luckily it was a Thursday, and then they had it on a Saturday, so it's not like it's not like I was like locked in my house for like weeks. It was it was fast enough. And then the one in India they had listen, they tried to tell me all kinds of things. Oh, we don't think our parents will be alive. My parents, my grandparents were alive, and they did see me get married. Okay, so that excuse doesn't even apply. They try to tell me that it's it's a very important part of our culture, and everyone is here to see you. No one was there to see me, everyone was there there to eat. They every single reasoning they gave me was wrong. It actually never turned out to be true. And they were like, Oh, your cousins are gonna spend so much time with you and you guys are gonna have so much fun. No, we actually all collectively hated the entire experience because the photographer would not leave us alone. And he went to the point where he didn't just take photos of me all the time, he then harassed my cousins. He wanted so many photos that two days or three days after the event, he came back to take more and we had to dress up again. And he made Aruna Tji and Retina and Madhana take more photos with me. So actually, collectively, every single reasoning they tried to give me all turned out wrong. I hated every minute of it. I genuinely hate every minute of it.

SPEAKER_01 19:26

Is it the same photographer as mine? I hate that man.

SPEAKER_02 19:30

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, honestly.

SPEAKER_01 19:32

I got mad beef with that photographer. Mad beef. I'll let you guys know why in a second. You will find out later in this episode why I have beef with that man. Do you like okay, day of? I know like your reasonings, none of those things worked out, but like day of, did you enjoy it? Like, did you have fun? Oh.

unknown 19:55

No.

SPEAKER_02 19:56

Okay. I woke up, I had to wake up so early, and then in the Surukuri house back then, like, like our house is super ancestral, so we didn't even have rooms, right? We don't have rooms or anything. So eat there were the technically that house has three rooms, but they're like the size of a closet, basically, like a walk a very small walk-in closet, and there's no ventilation. And so I had to wake up super early, and then multiple different people kept coming in and out. So I'm like half naked as people are coming in and out, opening the door, because they're because they're they're all they all want to try to tie the Davani for me. I'm like, it's a fucking half. Sorry, it's actually not rocket science, it's it's twofold and you're done. But do you know how many times that shit was untucked and tucked? And I'm just like, I'm just half naked as like the door is going back and forth, back and forth, and I'm screaming. I'm like, what is wrong with all of you? So then that happened. And then I wasn't hungry, so I didn't have breakfast, but then it just kept continuing and continuing, and I got really hungry. And by the time lunch happened, there was I got the leftovers of the leftovers, so like nothing basically. And then my parents, you know, they tried to so because that house is so old, it didn't have air conditioning or anything, but it had air coolers, but and it didn't have air coolers. We rented air coolers, and then a bunch of people sat in front of the air coolers, so I didn't get away. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_01 21:25

Well, all of the apas and the Amais and Apatas who sat in front of the air cooler came to mind as well, and I was mad pissed. I was like, can you stand farther away? Why are you blocking the air for all of us? This is not your air conditioner, this is my air conditioner.

SPEAKER_02 21:43

I don't know. And also, like, that was so annoying. I'm like, I'm so tired and I'm so hot, and I'm doing this because supposedly all of you want to be here. So just cut me some break and just give me a little bit of air because I'm sweating through this outfit. It that was hard, and then I'm also like I think I'm I'm an awkward person. I'm not the most I'm I'm an awkward person, period. And like the comments that people would be making, like, oh dashni, you're ready for marriage? Oh, Dashni's ready to have kids. I'm like, I'm 13, dude. I am 13 fucking years old. Why would you make comments like that to it? I was just so uncomfortable that entire day, like physically, emotionally, like the comments were getting to me, and I was like, I'm just over this. I'm actually over this. And the only nice part was that my cousins and I would make fun of people together. But other than that, it was just a very unpleasant experience for me. I'm sorry. I no, it's okay. I'm over it.

SPEAKER_01 22:48

I loved my setting game. I loved it. I love attention. I know everyone's so surprised to hear that. I didn't ask for a setting. I didn't really know what it was. Like I kind of was just doing whatever my parents wanted. But I like buying things and I like being the center of attention. So, and I like getting my picture taken. So this really all worked out for me for my settinge. I picked, I like accidentally picked like an expensive, sorry, but my mama still bought it for me. I remember all these, I just like have so many fun stories from it that I thought it was funny. Like, I think maybe not everyone would have perceived what I thought was fun as fun, but that's okay. Like, all these people were s so there's like a seeded that like your mom's side of the family brings. So it's like basically like stuff, like the sorry and the gold and like fruits and shit. And all like the old people were like commenting on it, like, oh, is that real or is that like fake about like the jewelry I was wearing? And me, you know, a liar, was like, oh, my Ayah bought me all of this brand new, and it's like all gold. And I think that these were like, I was like lying about how much they cost. I was like, no, don't you try and think that my Ayah is cheap right now. I'm just I'm just gonna lie. Like, he bought me this, and then we were like, that's not enough gold. So we last minute bought an extra necklace. Like, this is this is like where my joy is gaslighting that's amazing. So that was really fun. And then like I have a lot of mamas. I mean, I guess we both have a lot of mamas. So when they did the part where you they like go around in a circle and they break the cookies on your head, did you do that part too?

SPEAKER_02 24:53

Yeah, but I think for me, I don't know why we we have the same family, but for me it was the at this point.

SPEAKER_01 25:07

You're supposed to break it like gently, and I was getting like full cortes on my head, and I was like dying laughing, and it was just really fun. And the whole time I was super hungry, and Ate, my Ate kept on feeding me bananas from like the plates. She would just like hand me a banana and I would like eat it really fast, and then it would just like go on to the next person. So I don't know, I feel like those like small moments made like the monotony of it less painful. I do think my biggest I have two traumatizing experiences for my setting. The first one is the reason why I don't eat goat. They like made Vidani, obviously, and there was a goat, but like you know how like when you buy things from a butcher shop in America, there isn't like a goat-shaped thing that's dead in your house. Yeah, yeah, there was a goat-shaped thing that was dead in like my house, and I walked down the stairs and I like screamed, cried, and then ran all the way back up the stairs, and that was traumatizing. And then to make matters worse, they what's it called? Upukando. They made so Upukando is like the dried hooves of the goat. This is so messed up, but they dried it on my window, like the opening of my window. Why they gotta do that to me? That's that's so funny. Why they gotta do that to me? And then the other thing is I had braces because I was 13, so I had braces, and my mom told me that I was ugly when I smiled with my braces, so she made me close my whole mouth and smiled without without my teeth showing, so I looked ridiculous in every single one of my pictures, which there were a million of because we have the same photographer who is unfair that he still has a job. So the only good pictures are the ones where I'm like laughing, like the canted ones, are the ones that are really good. But since I promised we would get back to the story of why I have beef with this photographer man, is that after the sudden, we all got an album, and this man had nothing better to do with his life than go and translate what suddenge means in English. So in bold, on my album, he writes puberty ceremony over it. Like, who does that? So I know we had different experiences with our suddengas, but if you had a daughter, would you have one for her?

SPEAKER_02 28:03

I mean, if she wants one. I think that something that I'm trying really hard, a cycle that I am trying really hard to end with me and my family is that I come from a long line of people pleasers. And they gave birth to a people pleaser. And you know, it's why I had three weddings, it's why like I think I give in to a lot of things. And so the one thing that I've made really clear though, whether it's to my parents, whether it's to my husband's parents, or to anyone, to my grandparents, is that the cycle of people pleasing ends with me, which means that your expectations for me, I've accepted, I've held on to, I've actually fulfilled all of them, right? The one expectation I have not yet fulfilled because that I'm really gonna take my sweet time, whether or not I want to, is giving everyone a grandchild, right? That that is one expectation I'm not fulfilled. But everything else, I got married, how how you all wanted. I graduate, like all of this other stuff. Yeah. Cool. The one thing that I it will end with me is like doing things because my do telling my child, well, your grandparents really want you to do this thing, or this person. Like, I'm gonna ask them, do you want this? I'm gonna tell them, hey, like, and you're gonna have different experiences. Like Bunnyaka liked hers, you loved yours, I didn't like mine. But that doesn't mean that it's as wrong for me to deprive them of something just because I didn't like it, than it is for me to force them to do something, right? So I'm gonna leave it in their hands. If they want one, I will go all out. If they want a small one, I will do a small one. If they don't want one, they don't need one. But the one thing I will not be doing is if they don't want a sadenge, I'm not gonna tell anyone that my child's a that's a that's a tradition that's gonna end with me. If my child does not want a sadinge, I'm not gonna be announcing it to everyone that my child got their period. It's a weird, it's a really weird tradition, and I'm I don't want to do it. I'm not gonna do it. So that's one thing I stand very firmly about that I won't budge on everything else.

SPEAKER_01 30:13

I agree. I think there's nothing that you should be ashamed of when it comes about your to your period, but I think this, like, oh, I'm just waiting for my kid to have her period thing is like weird. I think it's like a weird amount of pressure on like something you can't control. Like, now I gotta put pressure on my kid's endometrial lining. Like, do we not put enough pressure on her for things? Like, that's insane. Like, I don't like that part. I think that nobody needs to know my kids' business. Like, my parents don't share anything about us, like, ever. But like, weirdly, my period was something we had to announce to the whole entire world. Like, that's that's so funny. That's weird. That's weird. I think that that's about boundaries, and I think that's really important. But initially, when I was thinking about this answer to this question, I was like, oh my god, yeah, totally, because I loved it and I had so much fun. But like, it's very reasonable that my kid wouldn't like it. It's fine, it's fine. Like, for me, what I really enjoyed was being able to spend time with my family and like do something together. And I think that part was really fun for me, especially as someone who didn't really live super close to my the rest of my family on like in like regular life. But there's ways to be around your family that doesn't include putting someone on display that doesn't want to be on display. So I feel like I wish I would like to educate if I do have a kid, I would like to educate my child more about like what their body's gonna go through and like how to navigate that and not to feel shame within it, rather than like focus on how other people feel about my kids' menstrual cycle.

SPEAKER_02 32:18

100%. 110%.

SPEAKER_01 32:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 32:23

Let's not normalize. Let's not nor like let's can let's stop the when are yppa when are you getting your period? Yep, when are you gonna feed us? Coming up to a child and asking when are you getting your period is actually fundamentally fucked up. So if you're gonna behave that way, I'm gonna tell you that if you're too poor to have food, I got food at home. My grandmother's very generous.

SPEAKER_01 32:49

I don't know, man. I feel like people's like weird investment in like the reproductive functions of young girls is giving pedophiles. So like I feel like I would go that far. It is gross. It is, it's so gross. But you know, I I think there's a difference between culture and I think growth of a culture, and I think just because something has been tradition in the past, it doesn't mean that it needs to like continue in the same manner that it was done in the past.

SPEAKER_02 33:26

Yeah, I think we can totally honor, like, there's so much there there is beauty in the idea that hey, this young person is becoming an adult. Right? There's beauty in, hey, we need to recognize that when this person is going through this, we need to give them rest. Like, let's hold on to what these things were supposed to mean and not what we have like twisted and turned generation over generation what it means now. It's okay. It was really, it was it was very nice back then. Let's some things, let's just hold on to that. Let's cut the crap, let's cut all of this crap that came after and just hold on to the essence of it. Because sounding is not a bad thing, it's a beautiful thing, it's it's a culture. It's like, hey, we're getting ready to get married. Hey, like we're we're no longer young, we're now adults. Like, there's so much beauty in the significance of what that event means. It shouldn't be cheap into when are you getting your period? And can you feed me food? Food at home any day. Come over. I can cook now.

SPEAKER_01 34:38

What is one thing you wish you could change about your like first period experience? Or like, what is something, it doesn't have to be that. What is something that you wish you could tell like your younger self on that day in that moment?

SPEAKER_02 34:53

That through your life, people are gonna tell you a bunch of different ways to feel about it, and they're going to associate it with a bunch of different things, such as if you snap at someone, sometimes people ask, Are you on your period? If you go to a temple and people are worried, they're gonna ask, Are you on your period? Like there's so many things that people will associate it with, and it is your responsibility to remember that actually your period has absolutely nothing to do with any of that. Your period means that you are powerful, that you are able to do so much, you are able to withstand pain and do so much. It means that you can give birth to life. There's so much powerfulness that comes from this idea. And it's unfortunately, people will tell you that it means something else, but you didn't give a shit what people thought then. Don't give a shit what people say as you grow up. I mean, that just I think is the most important thing. Know what you believe in and stick to it, especially about something like your period, because people will always try to mess it up for you.

SPEAKER_01 36:08

Well, that was like really powerful and insightful. I was gonna say, don't listen to your mom and smile in your pictures because you look cute in your braces, too. But that seems really I can edit my answer. So no, it's not cool. Awesome. Well, no, I mean I agree. I totally agree. I feel like your period is like a really cool thing that your body does. I know it's gross sometimes, I know it's painful, but it's a really cool thing that your body does. And I think that knowing about how your body works and learning about your body and being comfortable with that body is so much more important than like literally anything else. Like other people don't matter, they just don't. And I think like I would tell myself to like protect my peace and do my own research when it comes to how to take care of my body, and don't listen to your mom when she says it's not normal to not have your period when you're on medications that alter your period, because that's a lie. Dear team, this is my advice to you. It is perfectly healthy to not have your period if you are taking medication to not have your period. Do not listen to your mom when she says that it's not normal or healthy. Nothing is gonna build up inside you because the hormone levels do not alter in order for your endometrium to thicken. So that's why you don't have your period. Oh, for our younger listeners out there, if your parents are being weird about your period, tell them that your Akkas from the podcast told them to stop being weird and just let you live your life. Okay.

unknown 38:21

Bye.